rehabbed:

if you take me on a date to an amusement park you have a 103% chance of getting laid

scoutblu:

starrypier:

MUG CAKE: 5TH ATTEMPT

DID IT JUMP OUT OF THE CUP

selfdoubtandsyphilis:

dankestrnemes:

do animals think in english or in the sounds they make

this is what yahoo paid $1.1 billion for

ambassador-of-anguish:

shouldertappingghosts:

If I was a famous author I would publish a book with ten different endings which all went to print with varying degrees of rarity, but not tell the fans about it so that I could watch their confusion as they disagree over how the story ended. Then when they figured it out I would ‘come clean’, telling them that I had released eleven alternate endings and watch them panic again as they all try to find the last ending.

This is perfect.

simplymykayla:

cnnbreakingofficial:

if tumblr was bought out for $1.1B and there are 60 million blogs that means each blog is worth $18.3 

my blog is worth more than i am

You’re the cutest

oyveyzqueer:

steve-spaghetti:

renirabbit:

pizzalecki:

pkmnbreederbrianna:

togamijail:

chandra75:

im-sherlocked-in-my-mindpalace:

socially-awkward-supervillian:

Fun fact: Cheetahs only attack prey that runs

jesus that is good to know.

Yup, that’s the point you just stay still and let it do whatever the fuck it wants that doesn’t involved you getting eaten. 

REALLY FUN FACT for big cats cheetahs are fucking docile as shit

my grandfather ran a cheetah sanctuary in south africa and he’d just lie with them and sleep among them and they’d rub against him and chirp at him they’re big fucking babies

Another Fun Fact: Cheetahs are incredibly nervous animals. One of the (many) reason’s they’re going extinct is that cheetahs are so sensitive and nervous, some of them are literally too nervous to breed. Others will breed, but stress themselves out so much, they’ll lose their cubs.

So zoos with breeding programs had to figure out how to make cheetahs comfortable enough to first of all, get laid and secondly - not spazz themselves into miscarrying.

So what’d they do?
They gave the cheetah’s their very own Service Dogs!


The dogs make them feel safe, protected and secure!

AJHHHHFDDGHH SO PRECIOUS

this post just got so much better

THIS IS OFFICIALLY MY FAVOURITE POST

can i be a service human for a nervous cheetah